How I know my sexuality.
- Thread starter boc
- Start date
Thank you, but I think I'll stay right here for now. No matter men might claim to be straight who are bisexual does not alter the data unless one assumes such claims as overwhelming. The self-reported studies commonly show less than 5% of men identify as bisexual. Posturing that 45% or more of the other respondents are making such fallacious claims stretches credulity. Rather, the data is so pervasive and consistent, it should just be accepted as is. The question is: why is it so difficult to accept?
For me, I never will understand why today’s generation is so hung up on labels. These days there are SO MANY different new “terms”, some are just laughable & sound completely silly.
For the label lovers, they will label me as Bisexual, which is fine, because I do enjoy having sex with both men and women. Gen it comes to sex and sex alone, I can get down with both. But I will say that I enjoy sex with women more than men (to put a ratio to it I guess I’d say 60% enjoy sex with women 40% with men). However, when it comes to having an emotional/mental connection/attraction, tho it was a journey throughout my teens and my twenties, before I finally realized who I truly AM & what I truly like (now in my mid thirties), I found myself to have “deeper” connections with men more than women the majority of the time.
But here’s my dilemma. Before I go any further, most will now label me as GAY/Homosexual with this additional revelation. But here’s the thing, I don’t know if I can/want to 100% give up having sexual encounters with women. Why? Because though I do enjoy sucking dick, I dont LOVE anal sex (receiving & giving). I have done both, & I do enjoy it, but only on my own terms. When I’m “in the mood” so-to-speak. I tend to prefer vaginal sex over anything else any day. Anal sex comes with a lot of prep work before it gets going, whereas vaginas are “MOSTLY” (but not all or always) readily and easily available for penetration with minimal prep work involved (especially for those that are “wetter” than usual).
Moving on, I am not attracted to trans women. Chicks with dicks is just not sexually or physically attractive to me. BUT, on that note, & this is a more recent self-discovery, I found myself REALLY intrigued and fascinated with TRANS MEN. & honestly? Lately? I’ve been really thinking about experimenting with a Trans Man. Because when I think about it, and based on my revelations described above, it sounds like the PERFECT scenario for me right? Dating a Trans Man would satisfy my need to establish a deeper emotional connection, which I enjoy with men more than women, and then the sexual aspect is satisfied with my desire for vaginal sex as long as the Trans Man hasn’t had and/or doesn’t want/desire to have bottom surgery!
I found myself perusing through a bunch of trans men porn recently which had my imagination running WILD! I picture myself pounding away at a nice warm wet pussy, in missionary position, while looking down at a gorgeous looking man.
Getting a little carried away here so let me get back on track lol. My point is, I am just enjoying living my life as my true authentic self. I like what I like, & since my “likes” are not black and white, I don’t believe I belong to one specific category of people when it comes to sexual attraction, sexuality, or sexual orientation. I am confident and happy with who I am & who I am attracted to and I don’t need a label to make me happy or feel like I “belong”.
And I am in NO WAY knocking anyone who disagrees with this ideation or anyone who likes or needs a label in order to feel that sense of belonging or perhaps need it in order to find themselves & know where they “fit in”. I am just simply sharing my own personal thoughts, feelings, & opinions on the topic and I enjoy hearing/reading the opinions of others especially those that think or believe differently than I do! I am EXTREMELY open minded & welcoming of all walks of life & opinions/ideations, as for me, I believe it helps me grow & become wiser being educated & learning about different things when it comes to….. let’s just say,,, when it comes to “LIFE”.
I’ve been given all sorts of labels from straight with gay tendencies, gay with straight tendencies, bisexual, sexually fluid, pansexual (even though i’m pretty sure I don’t qualify for this label as, to MY understanding, Pansexuals are equally attracted to ALL sexes/genders), duo sexual (is this even a real term??? lol), and the list goes on. I NEVER make my sexual preferences public without being asked. Meaning I don’t ever bring it up in conversation or advertise it in anyway. The only time I’ll reveal any details is if someone asks me straight up. When that happens, I’ll be honest, I always just use the term “bisexual” because with my experience, I have learned that MOST common folk, aren’t educated enough on the topic, or completely against it, or just simply don’t know about all the different preferences when it comes to the topic of sexuality. So, to avoid going into some long drawn out complicated explanation & to avoid puzzled/confused looks and expressions, I just go with a term that most people are familiar of and understand.
Because at the end of the day, my self expression and self identity is solely for MY OWN HAPPINESS & SATISFACTION with MY LIFE. I’m not here to please or cater to anyone else other than myself. So, it doesn’t matter to me what anyone else thinks about me or who I am or what I like or don’t like. Not only is it honestly, none of your business but who I choose to love and/or have sex with in no way shape or form affects YOUR life. You can either accept me for who I am, & if you like my personality and simply like me as a person, then we can be friends! If not, then kick rocks!
Society & the opinions of others, religion, governments, etc. Have shaped the way people think today. After thousands of years and generations upon generations of people, society has made the ability to publicly just be yourself something to fear, whether it’s due to the beliefs of your friends and family, religion, or the laws/governement, etc. It’s not easy to be anything other than a heterosexual in this world. So combined with societies expectations of what a MAN is supposed to be, most men are afraid to act on their “curiosities” let alone even ADMIT that they are attracted to men or may be attracted to or might be interested trying something to fear. Fear of being rejected, shunned, harassed, beaten, killed, jailed/prisoned, expelled, banned, humiliated, hated, scoffed at, etc. Which is sad to say, but we all know it is what it is. Because I KNOW for a FACT that there are WAYYYYYY more men out there who have either experimented with men or at least thought about it. But most would rather take that to their grave than let it be known to the world. Which at the end of the day is also a personal choice. And for me, there’s nothing wrong with that.
But let me shut up now! I could go all day, so let me wrap it up here! I enjoyed reading everyone’s post on this thread and it compelled me enough to want to share my story/thoughts/opinions on the topic. Looking forward to reading more of my fellow LPSG brothers’ posts on the subject! And if you made it this far, thanks for reading what I have to say!
Cheers fellas!
For the label lovers, they will label me as Bisexual, which is fine, because I do enjoy having sex with both men and women. Gen it comes to sex and sex alone, I can get down with both. But I will say that I enjoy sex with women more than men (to put a ratio to it I guess I’d say 60% enjoy sex with women 40% with men). However, when it comes to having an emotional/mental connection/attraction, tho it was a journey throughout my teens and my twenties, before I finally realized who I truly AM & what I truly like (now in my mid thirties), I found myself to have “deeper” connections with men more than women the majority of the time.
But here’s my dilemma. Before I go any further, most will now label me as GAY/Homosexual with this additional revelation. But here’s the thing, I don’t know if I can/want to 100% give up having sexual encounters with women. Why? Because though I do enjoy sucking dick, I dont LOVE anal sex (receiving & giving). I have done both, & I do enjoy it, but only on my own terms. When I’m “in the mood” so-to-speak. I tend to prefer vaginal sex over anything else any day. Anal sex comes with a lot of prep work before it gets going, whereas vaginas are “MOSTLY” (but not all or always) readily and easily available for penetration with minimal prep work involved (especially for those that are “wetter” than usual).
Moving on, I am not attracted to trans women. Chicks with dicks is just not sexually or physically attractive to me. BUT, on that note, & this is a more recent self-discovery, I found myself REALLY intrigued and fascinated with TRANS MEN. & honestly? Lately? I’ve been really thinking about experimenting with a Trans Man. Because when I think about it, and based on my revelations described above, it sounds like the PERFECT scenario for me right? Dating a Trans Man would satisfy my need to establish a deeper emotional connection, which I enjoy with men more than women, and then the sexual aspect is satisfied with my desire for vaginal sex as long as the Trans Man hasn’t had and/or doesn’t want/desire to have bottom surgery!
I found myself perusing through a bunch of trans men porn recently which had my imagination running WILD! I picture myself pounding away at a nice warm wet pussy, in missionary position, while looking down at a gorgeous looking man.
Getting a little carried away here so let me get back on track lol. My point is, I am just enjoying living my life as my true authentic self. I like what I like, & since my “likes” are not black and white, I don’t believe I belong to one specific category of people when it comes to sexual attraction, sexuality, or sexual orientation. I am confident and happy with who I am & who I am attracted to and I don’t need a label to make me happy or feel like I “belong”.
And I am in NO WAY knocking anyone who disagrees with this ideation or anyone who likes or needs a label in order to feel that sense of belonging or perhaps need it in order to find themselves & know where they “fit in”. I am just simply sharing my own personal thoughts, feelings, & opinions on the topic and I enjoy hearing/reading the opinions of others especially those that think or believe differently than I do! I am EXTREMELY open minded & welcoming of all walks of life & opinions/ideations, as for me, I believe it helps me grow & become wiser being educated & learning about different things when it comes to….. let’s just say,,, when it comes to “LIFE”.
I’ve been given all sorts of labels from straight with gay tendencies, gay with straight tendencies, bisexual, sexually fluid, pansexual (even though i’m pretty sure I don’t qualify for this label as, to MY understanding, Pansexuals are equally attracted to ALL sexes/genders), duo sexual (is this even a real term??? lol), and the list goes on. I NEVER make my sexual preferences public without being asked. Meaning I don’t ever bring it up in conversation or advertise it in anyway. The only time I’ll reveal any details is if someone asks me straight up. When that happens, I’ll be honest, I always just use the term “bisexual” because with my experience, I have learned that MOST common folk, aren’t educated enough on the topic, or completely against it, or just simply don’t know about all the different preferences when it comes to the topic of sexuality. So, to avoid going into some long drawn out complicated explanation & to avoid puzzled/confused looks and expressions, I just go with a term that most people are familiar of and understand.
Because at the end of the day, my self expression and self identity is solely for MY OWN HAPPINESS & SATISFACTION with MY LIFE. I’m not here to please or cater to anyone else other than myself. So, it doesn’t matter to me what anyone else thinks about me or who I am or what I like or don’t like. Not only is it honestly, none of your business but who I choose to love and/or have sex with in no way shape or form affects YOUR life. You can either accept me for who I am, & if you like my personality and simply like me as a person, then we can be friends! If not, then kick rocks!
Society & the opinions of others, religion, governments, etc. Have shaped the way people think today. After thousands of years and generations upon generations of people, society has made the ability to publicly just be yourself something to fear, whether it’s due to the beliefs of your friends and family, religion, or the laws/governement, etc. It’s not easy to be anything other than a heterosexual in this world. So combined with societies expectations of what a MAN is supposed to be, most men are afraid to act on their “curiosities” let alone even ADMIT that they are attracted to men or may be attracted to or might be interested trying something to fear. Fear of being rejected, shunned, harassed, beaten, killed, jailed/prisoned, expelled, banned, humiliated, hated, scoffed at, etc. Which is sad to say, but we all know it is what it is. Because I KNOW for a FACT that there are WAYYYYYY more men out there who have either experimented with men or at least thought about it. But most would rather take that to their grave than let it be known to the world. Which at the end of the day is also a personal choice. And for me, there’s nothing wrong with that.
But let me shut up now! I could go all day, so let me wrap it up here! I enjoyed reading everyone’s post on this thread and it compelled me enough to want to share my story/thoughts/opinions on the topic. Looking forward to reading more of my fellow LPSG brothers’ posts on the subject! And if you made it this far, thanks for reading what I have to say!
Cheers fellas!
oh cry baby trying to essay his way into self complacency.
It’s not about labels, it’s about what they represent.
Being gay is about men loving men—men with dick btw, loving men with dick, sexually and physically. It is what the movement was about when it first started. When folks call themselves gay, they’re standing up for their rights to love a man (with a dick) as a man (with a dick). Back in the day, that’s what being gay meant, and there’s nothing wrong with that.
And Nothing wrong with you “no label” crowd or the idea behind it. But when you start promoting or forcing or pushing the idea of sexual fluidity, do you know how uncomfortable it can make of gay men who only love and want men? It’s like forcing straight men to be gay. MANY gay men simply don’t want to try with women, nor do they want to try vagina on a trans man, yet people like you try to “push” it by claiming the “no label” victim mentality or try to spread “diversity”. It’s…. Resembling conversion therapy to say the least.
Honestly you be you, but there are men with a dick out there who ONLY want men WITH a dick. These men are gay, and proudly gay. Leave them alone, and they’ll leave you and your whatever sexuality alone.
Not to mention, being gay a lot of times means being anti-heteronormative and not succumbing to social pressure. But then there’s you “no-label” crowds who probably only choose to not label yourselves just so you could find the reason to live a heteronormative life with the opposite sex because it’s easier, even if that means settling down with the 2nd or 3rd choice. Completely thwarting the life for gay men gay activists have fought for since the Victorian era. Not to mention how easily this no label thing can be weaponized as “being gay is a choice” by homophobes.
Labels are useful things as your post attests. Just as you "never will understand why today’s generation is so hung up on labels," I will never understand why people try to obfuscate who they are rather than proudly standing up as individuals.
Woah. Okay guys. I’m not sure why my post is so offensive to those of you who quoted my post. My post isn’t even saying anything negative or that anything is wrong with the different labels regarding the many different types of sexual orientations.
Why does my post upset you so much? Am I not allowed to be content with MYSELF without choosing to describe myself as a particular label? Would it make you happy if I just said “I’m this or that?”.
And, me choosing to not label myself & place myself into a category of people is not me wanting to give off a perception to others that I’m living a “heteronormative” lifestyle lol. I literally am NOT living a heteronormative life, so that would be silly.
I thought I could jump in and express myself as it seemed like a positive thread and a place where I could participate in discussions without being attacked, insulted, & ridiculed for just simply being myself. But it appears I was completely wrong about that.
If my post which I simply went into detail about ME & my experiences, & also had absolutely nothing to do with anyone other than MYSELF, offended you, than I sincerely apologize. I even made it crystal clear that those who do not agree with my personal choices & those that think and believe differently are not than welcome to express themselves without any criticism or judgment for me. I don’t think there is anything wrong with labels. I just personally don’t participate. Which shouldn’t be a problem to ANYONE.
The weaponizing comment was a bit over the top as well. i don’t see how my personal opinion gives others ammunition to use to weaponize anyone or anything. Because for one, as I also stated I am VERY private about my personal life. I don’t advertise or share those personal details with anyone unless I’m asked directly and even then I may choose to NOT share if I don’t feel comfortable to do so with whoever is asking me.
Anywho, again, I’m sorry if my post struck a nerve or two or several. That wasn’t my intention. I simply wanted to share my own thoughts and experience on the topic. And I suppose you can call me ignorant or what not for not knowing or understanding that my opinions or some of the things I said can be/are offensive. But, as I also mentioned, I enjoy hearing opinions from others who think, feel, & believe differently than I do. I like learning and enjoy becoming more educated on topics like this. So I’ll take this as a lesson learned and do better going forward. However, honestly? It makes me feel like I’m not allowed to express myself & be 100% honest and transparent without being verbally attacked and the ridiculed if my opinions/words/thoughts/choices/opinions/lifestyle/etc. is different from someone else or the majority.
I would never attack or ridicule any of you, but I guess that’s where we differ. If the majority believes that labeling is a necessity for self discovery & finding one’s place in the world, then great, so be it. I just don’t find it to be a big deal when it comes to MY life.
Again, I am truly sorry for pissing anyone off. Call me ignorant or whatever, but I really didn’t think anything I said was mean, hateful, derogatory, disrespectful, homophobic, weaponizing, etc. in any way. But, now I know & I’ll be more mindful going forward when it comes to sharing such details about myself publicly. Because I didn’t want to bring any negativity here. This should be a welcoming positive place for people to feel comfortable to share their thoughts and have meaningful constructive discussions on different things without issue. I respect everyone’s comments about what I said. And I apologize to each of you who responded and recieved my post as negative. Thank you for educating me and letting me know. It won’t happen again.
Why does my post upset you so much? Am I not allowed to be content with MYSELF without choosing to describe myself as a particular label? Would it make you happy if I just said “I’m this or that?”.
And, me choosing to not label myself & place myself into a category of people is not me wanting to give off a perception to others that I’m living a “heteronormative” lifestyle lol. I literally am NOT living a heteronormative life, so that would be silly.
I thought I could jump in and express myself as it seemed like a positive thread and a place where I could participate in discussions without being attacked, insulted, & ridiculed for just simply being myself. But it appears I was completely wrong about that.
If my post which I simply went into detail about ME & my experiences, & also had absolutely nothing to do with anyone other than MYSELF, offended you, than I sincerely apologize. I even made it crystal clear that those who do not agree with my personal choices & those that think and believe differently are not than welcome to express themselves without any criticism or judgment for me. I don’t think there is anything wrong with labels. I just personally don’t participate. Which shouldn’t be a problem to ANYONE.
The weaponizing comment was a bit over the top as well. i don’t see how my personal opinion gives others ammunition to use to weaponize anyone or anything. Because for one, as I also stated I am VERY private about my personal life. I don’t advertise or share those personal details with anyone unless I’m asked directly and even then I may choose to NOT share if I don’t feel comfortable to do so with whoever is asking me.
Anywho, again, I’m sorry if my post struck a nerve or two or several. That wasn’t my intention. I simply wanted to share my own thoughts and experience on the topic. And I suppose you can call me ignorant or what not for not knowing or understanding that my opinions or some of the things I said can be/are offensive. But, as I also mentioned, I enjoy hearing opinions from others who think, feel, & believe differently than I do. I like learning and enjoy becoming more educated on topics like this. So I’ll take this as a lesson learned and do better going forward. However, honestly? It makes me feel like I’m not allowed to express myself & be 100% honest and transparent without being verbally attacked and the ridiculed if my opinions/words/thoughts/choices/opinions/lifestyle/etc. is different from someone else or the majority.
I would never attack or ridicule any of you, but I guess that’s where we differ. If the majority believes that labeling is a necessity for self discovery & finding one’s place in the world, then great, so be it. I just don’t find it to be a big deal when it comes to MY life.
Again, I am truly sorry for pissing anyone off. Call me ignorant or whatever, but I really didn’t think anything I said was mean, hateful, derogatory, disrespectful, homophobic, weaponizing, etc. in any way. But, now I know & I’ll be more mindful going forward when it comes to sharing such details about myself publicly. Because I didn’t want to bring any negativity here. This should be a welcoming positive place for people to feel comfortable to share their thoughts and have meaningful constructive discussions on different things without issue. I respect everyone’s comments about what I said. And I apologize to each of you who responded and recieved my post as negative. Thank you for educating me and letting me know. It won’t happen again.
No one is saying you are weaponizing or attacking. But the movement of sexual fluidity or “no label”, once forced upon or pushed upon say men who only love men or women who only love women, can be twisted into borderline conversion therapy or another “being gay is a choice” type of thing. Again, stop complaining about labeling and just leave us who proudly stand behind our labels alone.
Who said your post was "offensive?" Stimulating a lively debate is hardly "weaponizing" or "pissing anyone off." People clearly are comfortable sharing their thoughts, as you hope, but those same people do not have to adhere to your precept that their shared thoughts be welcoming or positive. It is a wonder to me how people became so thin-skinned that a little controversy was so challenging to one's sense of self.
Who’s complaining? lol. Lord have mercy. I wasn’t complaining. There’s nothing to complain about. I literally just shared my own OPINION. Why is it that you can share your opinion but when someone else does it’s deemed “complaining”. If I was complaining I would have made it evidently so. Also, talking about “leave us people who proudly stand behind our labels alone.” Everybody is different, so not everyone is the same and not everyone is going to agree. I’m happy for you and anyone else who prefers to stand behind their chosen labels, that’s great for those people. It’s perfectly OKAY & you should 100% stand ten toes down on what you believe. No one said you shouldn’t or couldn’t or that you are wrong. Never said it was wrong or you or anyone else was wrong for standing firm in your convictions.
I’m going to give my original post another read to see why I’ve garnered such negative criticism, as when I typed that up, I was sooooo convinced that I was being 100% mindful of others & merely expressing my personal opinion & experiences. Clearly, I said something inappropriate or insulting/offensive, & since that was not at all my intention, I’d like an opportunity to make it right with the community.
*Re-reads original post*
Ahhh. I see. OKAY, after giving my original post a second reading, I’ll make one correction, with regard to the first paragraph of my original post, which now in hindsight I can see where I went wrong & why I gandered the negative criticism that I have received thus far:
~ORIGINAL VERBIAGE~
“For me, I never will understand why today’s generation is so hung up on labels. These days there are SO MANY different new “terms”, some are just laughable & sound completely silly.”
Now, after re-reading, I can see this being taken as insulting/negative. I’d like to take this opportunity to edit that to not be insulting or demeaning & post what I should have said in the first place:
*UPDATED VERBIAGE*
“For me, I never will understand why today’s generation is so hung up on labels. These days there are SO MANY different new “terms”, I can hardly keep up. But hey, just because I DON’T personally get it, it’s not for me to understand, so long as I remain respectful to those that do choose to self identify themselves using one of those many labels. I stand by everyone having a right to figure out who they are, & choose the appropriate term that fits him/her/them the most. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with labels & everyone should have every right to be themselves authentically & proudly stand behind their chosen label. Just because I don’t personally understand & choose to not participate, doesn’t mean that it’s wrong in any way.”
I apologize for saying that some labels are laughable and silly. That’s where I went wrong, because that definitely can be taken negatively and insulting, which I didn’t want to do. So I really am sorry for saying that. I 100% take those words back, even if I do/did personally think that, it’s not right for me to share that publicly as I do understand how that only gives those who are anti gay ammunition to use against people like us. I do not want to be on that side as I 100% fully support the LGBTQIA+ community. I don’t want to put anything out there that suggests otherwise. At the end of the day, I am entitled to have my own opinion, but I want to make sure that I show my support & leave out anything that suggests otherwise or can be taken as opposition. Though I have every right to say what I want because “Freedom of Speech”, doesn’t mean I want to say something that can hurt or offend someone. Sometimes, it’s best to keep certain thoughts to yourself. So, lesson learned for me, & will be more cautious going forward. If there was ever something pertaining to people’s right to label themselves appropriately put on the ballot for a vote, I’d 100% vote for people to have that right. In fact, anything that involves granting equal rights & opportunities for the LGBTQIA+ community I’d vote for those rights to be kept/added always.
Thank you all for keeping me in check & for educating me.
Last little side note:
I don’t believe sexual orientation is a choice. I personally am on the side that believes this is a biological/genetic influenced trait, HOWEVER, I do believe that people do and can CHOOSE to live their life based on their sexual orientation. Deep down & biologically he/she/they may be, for example, homosexual, but it is up to that person whether or not they want to live their life that way. I know there are many people out there who still choose to live a heterosexual lifestyle even though they admit to having sexual & emotional attractions to the same sex. So THAT is what I believe IS a personal CHOICE. People don’t choose to be gay, but they DO choose to live life as a gay person, for reasons that THAT particular person feels is important enough to them.
And if I may add something sorta off the MAIN topic, but it pertains to my previous paragraph, I am curious what people think about transgender individuals who chose to transition and then later choose to DE-transition for whatever reason. I’ve noticed/have started seeing more and more videos/interviews of transgender people who transitioned (starting hormone replacement therapy, have surgical procedures done, etc.) & then later regret their decision and choose to transition back to their original sex. Which, I initially thought how this could be damaging when it comes to the transgender community, by giving the FAR RIGHT folks a reason to support their belief in that being gay/transgender is a personal choice. The far right is taking these testimonials to support their case & using it to mislead the general public which is a shame.
I personally, don’t think it’s wrong for someone who initially made a choice to transition only to change their mind later. I mean it IS YOUR body & YOUR life. You should have the right to choose as you see fit for your own personal happiness & self-fulfillment! I just hate seeing far-rigbt, anti-trans/anti-gay people share these videos to prove their point. Instead of looking at it as just a transgender individual changing their mind about going through the process of transitioning their body to biologically & surgically transform into the sex/gender they weren’t assigned to at birth, they are using this to support their claims that being gay/transgender is a choice vs being biologically written in their DNA. What say you?
I’m going to give my original post another read to see why I’ve garnered such negative criticism, as when I typed that up, I was sooooo convinced that I was being 100% mindful of others & merely expressing my personal opinion & experiences. Clearly, I said something inappropriate or insulting/offensive, & since that was not at all my intention, I’d like an opportunity to make it right with the community.
*Re-reads original post*
Ahhh. I see. OKAY, after giving my original post a second reading, I’ll make one correction, with regard to the first paragraph of my original post, which now in hindsight I can see where I went wrong & why I gandered the negative criticism that I have received thus far:
~ORIGINAL VERBIAGE~
“For me, I never will understand why today’s generation is so hung up on labels. These days there are SO MANY different new “terms”, some are just laughable & sound completely silly.”
Now, after re-reading, I can see this being taken as insulting/negative. I’d like to take this opportunity to edit that to not be insulting or demeaning & post what I should have said in the first place:
*UPDATED VERBIAGE*
“For me, I never will understand why today’s generation is so hung up on labels. These days there are SO MANY different new “terms”, I can hardly keep up. But hey, just because I DON’T personally get it, it’s not for me to understand, so long as I remain respectful to those that do choose to self identify themselves using one of those many labels. I stand by everyone having a right to figure out who they are, & choose the appropriate term that fits him/her/them the most. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with labels & everyone should have every right to be themselves authentically & proudly stand behind their chosen label. Just because I don’t personally understand & choose to not participate, doesn’t mean that it’s wrong in any way.”
I apologize for saying that some labels are laughable and silly. That’s where I went wrong, because that definitely can be taken negatively and insulting, which I didn’t want to do. So I really am sorry for saying that. I 100% take those words back, even if I do/did personally think that, it’s not right for me to share that publicly as I do understand how that only gives those who are anti gay ammunition to use against people like us. I do not want to be on that side as I 100% fully support the LGBTQIA+ community. I don’t want to put anything out there that suggests otherwise. At the end of the day, I am entitled to have my own opinion, but I want to make sure that I show my support & leave out anything that suggests otherwise or can be taken as opposition. Though I have every right to say what I want because “Freedom of Speech”, doesn’t mean I want to say something that can hurt or offend someone. Sometimes, it’s best to keep certain thoughts to yourself. So, lesson learned for me, & will be more cautious going forward. If there was ever something pertaining to people’s right to label themselves appropriately put on the ballot for a vote, I’d 100% vote for people to have that right. In fact, anything that involves granting equal rights & opportunities for the LGBTQIA+ community I’d vote for those rights to be kept/added always.
Thank you all for keeping me in check & for educating me.
Last little side note:
I don’t believe sexual orientation is a choice. I personally am on the side that believes this is a biological/genetic influenced trait, HOWEVER, I do believe that people do and can CHOOSE to live their life based on their sexual orientation. Deep down & biologically he/she/they may be, for example, homosexual, but it is up to that person whether or not they want to live their life that way. I know there are many people out there who still choose to live a heterosexual lifestyle even though they admit to having sexual & emotional attractions to the same sex. So THAT is what I believe IS a personal CHOICE. People don’t choose to be gay, but they DO choose to live life as a gay person, for reasons that THAT particular person feels is important enough to them.
And if I may add something sorta off the MAIN topic, but it pertains to my previous paragraph, I am curious what people think about transgender individuals who chose to transition and then later choose to DE-transition for whatever reason. I’ve noticed/have started seeing more and more videos/interviews of transgender people who transitioned (starting hormone replacement therapy, have surgical procedures done, etc.) & then later regret their decision and choose to transition back to their original sex. Which, I initially thought how this could be damaging when it comes to the transgender community, by giving the FAR RIGHT folks a reason to support their belief in that being gay/transgender is a personal choice. The far right is taking these testimonials to support their case & using it to mislead the general public which is a shame.
I personally, don’t think it’s wrong for someone who initially made a choice to transition only to change their mind later. I mean it IS YOUR body & YOUR life. You should have the right to choose as you see fit for your own personal happiness & self-fulfillment! I just hate seeing far-rigbt, anti-trans/anti-gay people share these videos to prove their point. Instead of looking at it as just a transgender individual changing their mind about going through the process of transitioning their body to biologically & surgically transform into the sex/gender they weren’t assigned to at birth, they are using this to support their claims that being gay/transgender is a choice vs being biologically written in their DNA. What say you?
I think your original verbiage read just fine. It was clear, concise and conveyed meaning to which people could accept or take exception. It's a pity you felt compelled to alter it for the benefit of the hyper-sensitive. Saying that is not an endorsement of your statements; it is only to say that yielding to, or accommodating, people who take superficial exceptions to how you say what you say will never satisfy those who disagree. It is best to stand on your statements.
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